cats

I am not your cat

but such a mystery

Regardless of your loving care

I belong to ME!

Nestled safe within your arms

or rubbing against your leg

Appearing very humble,

yet I would never beg!

Only dogs will grovel

and play the lowly fool

I am so much more aloof

really much more cool!

I set the rules in your home

and take at least my share

If it is a problem

I don't really care

What is a Cat?

1. Cats do what they want.

2. They rarely listen to you.

3. They're totally unpredictable.

4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.

5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.

6. They expect you to cater to their every whim.

7. They're moody.

8. They leave hair everywhere.

CONCLUSION: They're tiny women in little fur coats.

Posted: 30 Nov 2006, 9:29am

Last week I had an intruder. She came with her own built in alarm. Squalling all night just outside my door, she left little question of her presence or her hunger. A few table scraps sufficed to quiet her and she rewarded me with her affection. I think this cat (now named Cupcake) was about as emotionally starved as she was hungry for food. I suppose someone dropped her off but I don't see why. She is affectionate, nicely colored, healthy and a general nuisance.

Did I say nuisance?

Yesterday she found a way into the living quarters of my house through the bathroom. Upon entry she dumped a box containing all the parts to the tub faucet. That action caused a chain reaction involving several bottles of shampoo and conditioner along with rolls of toilet paper. There is something about "cats and yarn" which closely resembles "cats with rolls of toilet paper". Halloween may be over but belated Halloween pranks evidently are always "in season" for cats. Cupcake T-P'ed my bathroom.

On the bright side I must confess this cat has been teaching me a few lessons about cats. I have always assumed cats to be a lot of trouble. I had no idea they shared the opinion in reverse about humans. I am learning how to co-exist with a feline. Always before, I assumed humans were in some way superior to cats. I was mistaken. In areas of intelligence, manipulation, creativity, shrewdness and cunning, cats are clearly superior. I have also learned that to be truly happy in a relationship with a cat, a man must be willing to place himself subject to every whim of the cat. In other words, one must realize subservience to find peace.

I have always considered that in broadly general ways cats were more feminine and dogs were more masculine in nature. Now I am beginning to realize that cats have a purpose beyond any I had even remotely envisioned before. They are sent to teach men how to cope with women. Perhaps I am finally beginning to see the light.

steve